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The robots are now delivering pizza, stealing the jobs from acne-cratered 19 year olds in every college town. Dominos just announced that self-driving robots will deliver pizzas. This is the new world. So, as the last generation to physically have a delivery job I feel it’s my responsibility to share the life lessons I learned […]

This is what I wish: that my daughters don’t go to school. I offered my oldest the very prestigious “Altucher Fellowship”. Never awarded before. Only awarded to her. Basically it says: do exactly what I tell you to do for a year and don’t go to college. I’m not sure she’s going to take it. […]

I don’t think Craig wanted to talk to me. For one thing, I smelled. I woke up late and rushed out to get to the “Women Entrepreneurs” breakfast where Craig Newmark, founder of Craigslist was speaking. There were about 40 women there, Craig, and then me. I crashed the breakfast. I had some questions for […]

I wanted to learn about stocks because I lost $15,000,000. I lost everything. And I wanted to maybe learn what I did wrong so I could start thinking how to make it back. I was a gambler at heart. I went from playing poker every day to playing the stock market every day. That’s mistake […]

I was going to give the worst talk of my life. I was in Kaiserslautern, Germany for a big conference that had accepted a research paper of mine. Prakash, my professor, asked to see my slides. “This is horrible!” he said when he saw them. We found a magic marker and he started redrawing all […]

Anne’s job was to make sure I wasn’t breaking the law. I, of course, was trying to try break the law as much as possible. I was working on my 3am website in 1996 for HBO. Like, if a girl was a 15 year old runaway why should her face be blurred out? Or if […]

Mike Tyson woke up and nudged me. “WTF?” I said and tried to stay asleep. “James, someone on Quora is asking for the top 7 Rules.” “So?” “Listen,” he said, so softly it was like a whisper, and he almost crushed me when he rolled over onto me. “Remember my one rule,” he said. I […]