If you could give your 21 y/o self one piece of advice, what would it be?

War ‏ @michiganwar: if you could give your 21 y/o self one piece of advice, what would it be?


It’s an ugly and cruel question! Because there’s so much I could tell him. So many things he can avoid: bad breakups, bad financial decisions, bad this, bad that. Almost everything was bad that happened to him. All you need is to avoid a couple of those bad things (out of 100s) and life would’ve seemed so much better.

But then I wouldn’t have this MOMENT that I’m living right now. Writing this answer, Claudia upstairs, a good banana lying right next to me that I just finished, music from some outdoor band wafting (I wanted to use that word) down the street into my window, 10 episode of Battlestar Galactica downloading on itunes right this second, Jonathan Franzen’s book of essays getting ready to be read by me. I wouldn’t have all the things that I’m excited about for tomorrow and this week.

If I had to tell my 21 year old self something I would just be dead silent. Because all the bad that happened led to this very moment here. And this moment is always always perfect.

BUT, if I could give a current 21 year old advice I would say this: do not worry so much about the future. Don’t obsess over something she said or he said in the past. All words and insults disappear within 24 hours tops. And all plans of the future are probablyu wrong. And all worries of the future are probably misplaced. So with the past and the future in such sorry shape, just focus on doing the right thing RIGHT NOW.

Oh, I have to add to that though. Be honest. Be kind. I am saying this in a selfish way completely. YOUR LIFE is actually better when you are honest and kind to others. You can’t get value without providing value for all the people around you.

Ok, let me check inside of myself to see if I’m truly done with this question. 21 years old is such a critical year. But, yes, I think that’s it. So to summarize: if you currently are 21: Be honest, be kind, RIGHT NOW. And if you were 21 years old in some distant past then HIGH FIVE, you made it to this great moment we all share this second.