Dear Me At 22: I Have An Important Message From The Future

First off, you might wonder how I could reach you from the future. I can’t tell you that. Stop asking.

Second, don’t believe anything in this letter. This is not an advice letter. You don’t need any advice from me.

After 22 you have some very happy moments and some very unhappy moments. Surprise!

I can tell you that the key to being a calm, pleasant person is three things:

  • developing competence
  • having good relationships with the people around you.
  • being as “free” as possible.

What does free mean? It has nothing to do with money or relationships.

Money and Relationships only magnify what is already inside you. What inside you is bad.

If you have a good relationship, you will ruin it. If you have money, you will lose it.

I can only describe with an example. Remember when you worked for that professor and you were always afraid what he would say to you?

Like, if he said, “good job” you would feel good about yourself. And if he said, “bad job” then you would feel bad about yourself.

BEING FREE MEANS YOU DON’T GIVE THAT POWER to any person or any goal or any object or any situation.

Being free means that YOU don’t even have the power to make yourself feel good or bad.

Think of all the things you are unhappy about right now. You don’t like the girl you are living with. You failed all your classes. You are horrible at everything you try to do.

If you subtract all of them from your thoughts, then what are you left with? You’re still you. The same you. But you don’t have any of those thoughts any more

You don’t have to forget. Just don’t dwell. New things will happen today. Amazing things. You can’t predict tomorrow. That’s why I’m writing this letter.

So no need to dwell on yesterday. You have today! That’s big enough.

Then you start to figure out who you are. Because the past is gone. Who are you today?

Your choice 100%.

That’s freedom.

But I know you want to argue with me. There’s all the skills I’ve learned, you say.


There’s all the people I’ve met, you say.


I’ve put a lot of time into X, Y, and Z, you can say.


I know some things are RIGHT and some things are WRONG.


I’m not going to argue with you. You’re only 22. You’re not even a piece of shit.

Listen to me:

Don’t believe anything I’m about to tell you.

If you listen to me, then you will never LEARN what I am about to tell you.

Listening is like programming a computer. You take stuff in, you process it, you spit life back.

Learning is different. It shatters your life. There’s bankruptcies, abortions, divorces, crying, bombing, deaths, betrayals. There’s fear.

There’s stark, raging, maddening, filthy fear.

Just relax. Those things are going to happen. Enjoy them. You can’t avoid them. These are opportunities to learn. That’s your only goal.

Listening makes you a better person. Learning makes you a new person. You have to rebuild yourself when you learn.

Here are some things you will learn. Some myths you have been taught to believe that you will learn were wrong.

You will be horrified when you learn them. You will think your life is over.

You will reach for the exact amount of pills that will kill you. You will hold them next to your mouth, about to swallow, when your baby starts to cry.

Enjoy it.

But listen to me: please don’t believe anything I tell you in the picture below.

See you soon.

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